How it feels after interacting with someone who doesn’t like you vs someone who accepts you. How does it feel when you spend time with people who don’t like you?! What’s the difference when people express that they genuinely accept you?
How it feels to be unique
No one could please everyone. That’s the beauty of our existence: our diversity. Our differences in choices, in things we like & what we don’t like, in how we look, dress, talk & even walk. I find it fascinating how there are things we need & dream about & hustle towards but it’s not necessary that others would resonate with it too. In every sense of the word, each of us is unique & every interaction that we have with each other is unique. Sometimes we do the same things but have different intentions behind it.
Be authentically YOU
It’s a waste of our precious time when we try to change other people’s perceptions of us. How they see us or think about us is out of our control. Instead, we must focus on working on ourselves so we can accept our authentic selves fully & like who we are. When we live authentically, expect that some people wouldn’t like it. It pains them to see you grow beyond their expectations of you & would always do their best to filter your words & actions so they could keep fitting you in a box.
No matter what you do & how hard you try, if someone wants to interpret it otherwise – that’s how it’s going to be. So, if you haven’t been aware of this, here are some differences between how it feels when you’ve interacted with someone who doesn’t like you VS someone who is fully supportive of you & accept you.
How It Feels After Interacting with Someone Who Doesn’t Like You
- Drained & Frustrated – When someone is acting negatively towards you, you are easily drained because this requires you to put up some sort of defense instead of being neutral & open.
- Confused – Interacting with someone who genuinely dislikes you could feel confusing. It’s difficult to get across any message & warmth towards them.
- Disrespected & dismissed – Your opinions & feelings wouldn’t matter to someone who doesn’t want to listen to you. Dismissive behaviors are signs of disrespect.
- Empty – It’s important to build your sense of self-esteem & solidify it. If you genuinely believe in yourself, how others treat you wouldn’t make you feel empty. Remember that your worth doesn’t depend on these people’s perspective of you.
- Unwelcome – You may feel like you’re not welcome to speak or act freely around these people. Whenever you leave the room, you would feel that they chat or laugh more. There’s this barrier that they put up when you’re around.
- Nervous & Calculated – You will find yourself to be on edge when you’re with them. You cannot rest nor express yourself honestly.
- Conscious – Since you can sense that they don’t like you, you would feel very aware of your words & actions in an attempt to avoid misinterpretation. Sometimes, you would even find yourself trying too hard just to fit in.
- Judged – They look at you with some sort of discrimination as if you did horrible things or that something’s wrong with you. When you’re in a good place & showing progress, they would ignore it instead of expressing support.
- Excluded – They always hold events & make plans without telling you. They rarely invite you to gatherings. Make it easy, don’t include them in your priorities.
- Indifferent – When you have mastered yourself though, you would learn to be able to preserve all your energy & focus on what truly matters even when you’re surrounded with people who don’t like you. No longer do any of their snarky remarks & side eye affect you. You can learn to ignore toxic behavior towards you masterfully & gracefully. Respect your own worth & personal boundaries. No longer would you feel guilty for showing up, instead you own your space & freely express who you are.
How It Feels When People Openly Express that They Accept & Like you
- Recharged – Spending time with people who like you feels like a blast! When you’re with them, you feel energized & time flies.
- Joyful – People who genuinely like you make you feel joyful. You sense this warm feeling of home & unbreakable trust.
- Supported – They openly express support & happiness whenever you share decisions or news with them. They also give helpful inputs when you ask them to.
- Loved – When you interact with people who accept & like you, you feel loved. After spending time with them, you even feel more deserving & sure of yourself.
- Heard & Respected – Spending time with people who accept you allows you to feel heard or listened to. They respect you & allow you to share your ideas & stories freely. They take time to listen to your thoughts & process it without judgment.
- Peaceful – There are moments of quiet with them that feels like a good rest. Since they accept you, you don’t feel pressured to fill in the quiet moments. You can just be who you are. Even when you don’t talk for a long time, once you do, it’s easy to communicate.
- Confident – They let you shine as who you really are & focus on the good things about you. Even if you’re not perfect, they encourage you to be your best self.
- Honest – You could feel upset or sad & they would be present to hear you or comfort you. You don’t need to tiptoe around them, you could easily speak your thoughts.
- Included – They include you in their plans & even tell you any life updates as soon as they can. They don’t keep things from you. Instead, they want to share important moments with you – whether it’s good or not. They invite you out & show up on your plans.
- Motivated- You would naturally feel motivated after spending some time with them. They push you beyond your comfort zone because they don’t put you in a tiny box. Instead, they see your potential. They help you see how much you could grow & are happy to see you change.
We cannot please everyone since we’re not within the same frequency as everyone else. In the end, it’s best to minimize contact with negative people. Focus on yourself & don’t take things personally. Their attacks don’t say anything about you but say a lot about them. Keep on re-building your self-esteem & surround yourself with positive people. Remember that you don’t owe anyone your time or energy. Prioritize your well-being & focus on people who are there to uplift you.
Coffee soon,
Anne